This week our friends' little one was diagnosed with Type 1 Diabetes. Since it is not my place to tell their story, I will continue with mine.
This horrible news sent me back to my own daughter's diagnosis a year and a half ago. My heart shattered that day. While it has mended, there is a great deal of scar tissue. I hope the scars get tougher with time. A piece of my heart cracked off for my friends' little one. I have spent twenty-four hours putting it back in place, choking back tears and a huge lump in my throat. This is a life-long journey, and it is not an easy one. Only another parent who has walked a mile in T1D shoes can truly understand the grief, anger, and the acceptance that comes with time.
Does it ever get easier? Yes, but at the same time, a very loud, resounding no. Management gets easier with gained knowledge and experience. Emotions become less raw. What never seems to get easier is knowing I could lose my child to this disease. Even if we are very careful and do our best to control it, one wrong step could turn into a nightmare.
Back then, words meant to soothe, full of others' beliefs didn't anger me the way they do now. Don't tell me it was god's will (or not) that my child has a life long disease. Or my absolute fav -- god only gives you what you can handle. Well, then. I have a few choice words for god. None of which are fit to put on here. I don't want my baby to "handle" this for the rest of her life. How do you even know there is a god? And if he is so kind and caring, why is it his will to hurt little children? Yet another un-ending argument...
Be careful with your words to a parent grieving over a child's disease. At first, it was easier not to acknowledge or talk about it, especially in the initial coping stages. There is nothing worse than crying in public - at least for me.
Now, ask me what you want. I'm happy to share my knowledge, and, with some, the emotional journey this disease has sent us on. A cure needs to be found so no else has to suffer needlessly.
